Time to Go Rogue. Homebrew Triathlon 101

‘I hate verizon.’ How can that feeling exist?…. Well make your own then. You go make one. Make your own network. Get some hubcaps and climb some trees. See how close yours is to perfect. – Louis CK, album Hilarious

So the bottom line is this: I am pretty fed up with WTC as a company right now. They canceled the 5150 Clearwater race with less than a month’s notice. This completely ruined my plan to end the 2011 season with a new distance. But, as much as I would like to complain (and I have, on two different forums, repeatedly), it’s time to move on and do it myself. A distance is a distance, regardless of the setup.

Announcing the 2011 Doughboy Year One Olympic Phoenix 5168 Triathlon

As I’m the only one eligible to register, I tailored the course accordingly.

Total Distance 51.68 km – note: this is NOT a closed course. It is point-to-point-to-point on open roads.

Course description
Swim Route – 1509 meters
25 yard Susquehanna University pool, in any available lap lane. 33 laps for 1650 yards. As there are lifeguards on duty, this is the only segment of the course with any support.
T1 – University locker room.

Bike Route – 40.14 kilometers

You will begin outside the field house, and exit the town of Selinsgrove, heading south on Route 15. A slight downhill will take you along the beautiful Susquehanna River. Heading uphill and north on route 104, you will turn just before route 35, to weave around more rollers south of your home, including the hill where you discovered that running fitness does not directly translate to biking fitness, and your planned first 15 mile ride turned into 3. At kilometer 39, you will conquer the tiny but steep hill that you had to walk the first 10 times you tried to ride it. Finally you will shoot downhill past your children’s day care to the end of the course and T2, the place where you preach every Sunday at 8:30am.

T2 – St Johns church basement

Run Route – 10.03 kilometers

From T2, you will run out the road where you took your first run Dec 1, 2010. You’ll cross over the creek bridge that was flooded over that day, soaking your cheap sneakers and socks through with freezing water. You’ll go up the tiny hill that you had to walk for the first 4 months, continuing past the dogs that try to tear through their fence to kill you, turn right onto the category 5 climb that you live on, and run past your house to the top of the hill. You’ll continue past your daughter’s school, and once into the next town, your son’s preschool, finishing the course at the place you preach every Sunday at 10:30am.
Post-race amenities: whatever you buy at Jennie’s Corner Store. Try to leave some oatmeal cream pies for the rest of the town.

Important Race Information

There will be no timing chip but your own Garmin 305. There will be no finisher’s medal. There will be no AG award. There will be no one at the finish line. There will be no aid stations. You will carry your hydration and fuel between transition areas.  You MUST carry a cell phone. A music player is not allowed on the bike course, but strongly encouraged on the run. You may also wear your swimp3 in the pool. Wetsuits are not allowed, as the pool is kept at 80-81 degress constantly.  Also you would be sort of an idiot.

There is no enforced course cutoff, though the external schedule of the pool dictates an 8am swim cutoff. As there is one wave, this give you 55 minutes to complete the swim.  You should finish the bike by 10:30am, and the run by 12:30pm.

Good luck!